life is a balance

lately I've been living with this huge fear of loosing people i love. I'm not talking about being betrayed. I'm talking about actually loosing them.. for good. Every time I'm going through a phase I don't just let it slide I actually want to know what caused it.. I'm one of these people that really believe  in  self-oberservation. I think it's really healthy to know that person you spend 24 hours 7 days a week - You! 

So I kept torturing myself and kept torturing my thoughts trying to understand why all the sudden this fear is so strong. I was/am familiar with fear of death like probably most of you.. not all of us would admit it but let's be honest most of us would pee our pants in front of the gun. But this blog post is not about that.. 

So my girlfriend volunteered in the self-observation process by listing. I know what you think an endangered species - listeners.

(endangered species - is a species of organisms facing a very high risk of extinction. VERY HIGH). 

After listening to me she said that we worry about different things depending on our age..It really got me thinking. What is different now. Why all the sudden. So I was driving home with all these questions in my head and it hit me. I realized I'm passed that phase worrying only about myself. I'm starting this new page of life.. creating my own family, my own home. That helped me to understand that it is not just some irrational fear it is a part of real love and appreciation of people we have in our life. Now I get to appreciate my family more and more. It's more about real things. 

so I went from unknown fear to appreciation. 

That is why self-obersvation is highly recommended. 

this blog post is dedicated to my grandmother Stanislava who is still alive and has so much joy of life that could share it with you. She is the brightest person I've ever known. 

I will never forget one thing she taught me: 

Life is a balance of holding on and letting go. 

choice

I hope you will enjoy this wonderful tune as much as I do. 

So some of you already know that I can't fall in love with a song without reading the lyrics. Nothing have changed.. read the lyrics and chose the line I love the most: 

"Raise your hopeful voice, you have a choice" 

you do have a choice. 

alone

and sometimes is the only way to understand yourself! because we shouldn't expect anybody else to help us with that..

Take "being alone" daily and you'll be surprised how many new things you'll find out about yourself.

mhm

Nouvelle Vague - This Is Not A Love Song

PS this is not a love... post 

far away

Far Away- Ingrid Michealson

I am far away.. in an island on an island in the Blue Bay.. that's how far away! 

Every time I hear this song I remember how many amazing people are far away... I miss you <3 div="" nbsp="">

And it's so not true that you can easily replace people.. maybe if you do everything on a surface but not me! 

I go far away in the relationship that what keeps me alive. 

mhm

always!

believe me it pays off.

and next to this new resolution of mine I'm sharing one of my favorite songs that always 

puts my spirit up!

Sandra Nkake - Higher

motivation

get your daily portion of motivation! somewhere. somehow. 

sharing my source of the day - 

WLT - Two Door Cinema Club - Something Good Can Work!

awake

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=l9VasRsyF2I

"I just think a lot of people back home, maybe here as well seem to be turned off. They just seem to be not conscious of a lot of things.. maybe it's always been like that though. I don't know.. You go to work. You do your robot bit for the day. You come home you turn your tv on.. hypnotize yourself for 4, 5, 6 hours and then you go to bed you get up and do the same thing. It's a.. It's just a crazy world that's all. It's crazy I don't understand it. I don't understand it I just feel.. I'm just aware of it. That's all. I guess what's happening in other parts of the world has to come to your part of the world before you start to wake up...!"  



Stay awake! 
otherwise you will miss the beauty of this world. 

..beliefs vs behavior..

I try to follow this path lately. 

No matter which one you choose - don't forget to smile!

always a Woman!

I know that every day belongs to us. But International Women's Day every year inspires me to look for something more
special
extraordinary
frank
sensuous
mysterious
inspirational ... just like women are!

As Billy Joel sings:
And she only reveals what she wants you to see ...
She is frequently kind
And she's suddenly cruel
She can do as she pleases
She's nobody's fool
And she can't be convicted
She's earned her degree
She hides like a child,
But she's always a woman to me...


Always be that woman to someone! ..and as Yves Saint-Laurent once said: "The most beautiful makeup for a woman is passion. But cosmetics are easier to buy."
Promise to me that you'll never take the easy way!

Happy International PASSIONATE Women's Day! :*

!Silence..

I couldn't resist to use one lithuanian song in this post (Silence by Jazzu acoustic version).  It's just so soulful, deep and beautiful. I even believe that you can feel it even without understanding the meaning of it...
this is just an excerpt from this song:

Aš tikiu tavo tyla...
Mano namai - siela tavo...
Tu aplenki mintis...
Tavo namai - mano širdis...


I believe in your silence ...
My home is your soul ...
You outrun my thoughts ...
Your home is my heart ...


Talking about the silence, have you ever thought about the meaning of it? I mean it's pretty easy to remain silent when you're alone (not for everyone of course.. think about singing in the shower). But when you're with someone. Does silence make you feel uncomfortable? Have you ever thought: wow. what an awkward silence!?
I have to be honest here, I fell like this quite often. What do I do? I start telling a lot of jokes and we are still in this awkward situation but because of my jokes this time..
Thinking more about it made me realize that I only get this uncomfortable around people I don't know or barely know. The beauty of silence is that someone could be silent because they feel comfortable with you and don't feel the need to say anything. Funny how silence can be so meaningful. As someone once said:

If you don't understand my silence, you'll never understand my words. 

Enjoy the silence. Because if you do you're sharing your time with the right person...

one more thing not to forget:

Speak only if your words can improve the silence!

I made this print but this amazing picture is not mine..unfortunately I couldn't find the owner... 

mirrOR

one of the hardest things is to recommend a movie. At least for me... One/Some very smart person once said: "A book is like a mirror. If a fool looks in, you can't expect a genius to look out.." A little bit harsh but true. This can be said about movies as well, but I would put it in a little bit different way.. Before saying I know you gonna love this movie I want to know what is on your mind right now. What worries you.. what makes you feel confident.. what disappoints you. What lifts your soul up and makes you forget all these unanswered questions.. do you have your happy place? So many questions. I know! That's why I was so hesitant to write about movies.. but I will put all my hesitations away (for now) and let you use that mirror and choose!

so probably you have already seen this movie called Into the Wild. If your answer is yes this post will be a friendly reminder... If not I would recommend you to watch it. Unless you feel like you are not ready to dig deeper today! Sometimes I have these days when my head is filled with thoughts and questions and I wouldn't want to let any more in. If you're not having one of those days - take a journey... 

take a journey to the beauty of the nature as imperfect human being. Take a journey along that wild seeking to be understood..  Take a journey into knowing how important it is in life not necessarily to be strong... but to feel strong! 

Some memorable quotes from this movie:

Some people feel like they don't deserve love. They walk away quietly into empty spaces, trying to close the gaps of the past. 

If we admit that human life can be ruled by reason, then all possibility of life is destroyed. 

The core of mans' spirit comes from new experiences. 

THE MOST memorable quote:

Happiness only real when shared. 

I wanted to end this post on a happy note.. so I found this wonderful picture (1920s zip-line) and 

combined this lovely shot with these simply wonderful words. share!

l.Ove

Happy Valentine's day!

I wish you all to find a way to take somebody's arm and put it on your heart.. 

in other words I wish you to be able to communicate your feelings. 

No boundaries, No buts

 Love and be loved because there's nothing bigger in the world.

All I need.

Hey! I don't know if you know this song but as I said many times before: sharing is caring.. 

All I need is a little time, 
To get behind this sun and cast my weight, 
All I need is a peace of this mind, 
Then I can celebrate. 

All in all there's something to give, 
All in all there's something to do, 
All in all there's something to live, 
With you ... 

So enjoy this wonderful Air tune and give. do. live. don't just drift through your life. 

borrowed this picture from I am a dreamer

sharing.. matters!

you have to agree, coffee tastes so much better with a great friend! and it doesn't stop there... A trip is more exciting,  a walk is more interesting, a dance is more fun, a problem is lighter once you share it with a Friend. Having someone to share your joy with - matters! 

Quoting - Sherman Alexie - 

“If you let people into your life a little bit, they can be pretty damn amazing.”

dance

Don't let them put you down just because they don't hear your music...
dance!

so you think.

...or sometimes with this label - "adult" we are kinda forced to say/pretend we understand these rules! Save energy and stop pretending because you have to remember or admit once you say you understand the rules you have to play by them as well.. lets be honest who wants that?